After the Storm

Darkness envelopes me

In a room shrinking with guilt and shame

In the cold room where no arms embrace

Just disgrace and accusations

Just cold, relentless lies

Yet I wrestle through the night

Alone.

Fearful of exposing my heart

For the judgment that rips it apart

I cry out

But the tears feel like inconvenience

Like suffocation

Yet no words can console

The brokenness that reopened

Selfishness fights to take control

But the innocent cries out

God help me.

I can't help myself.

Where is my help?

In this fight

Loneliness envelopes me

Reminds me of all the reasons why

God, you gave me four

And that's all I have

Even in the end

To the end

If I should ever be enough

So forgive me

For wanting what I lost

For asking for help in navigation

With what is broken

Darkness and loneliness is all that's left

So help me find my way

To You

To the one who must love me,

Me.